It’s amazing the difference a year makes. This week marks one year since we moved back to Seattle. We were originally going to settle down somewhere in or near Boulder, Colorado. We wanted to be nestled up against the rocky mountains after having lived in the flats of the midwest for five years. We dropped our stuff off at a storage unit in Denver before our road trip began and didn’t know when we would see our belongings again – and didn’t care! We were SO excited to explore the open road.
Living like a free birds and traveling from place to place was the experience of a life time. Longtime dreams were fulfilled, adventures were had. It was AMAZING. As time went on though, it became increasingly clear that our son’s health concerns were something that had to be addressed as the issues around his special needs became more and more difficult to manage. Our business was not getting the attention it needed to thrive on the road and our support system in Colorado was not as solid as we thought.
We were devastated. Our hearts were broken.
Our time on the road was clearly winding down and to start over again in a new place with few resources and support was a foolish thing to do moving forward. We needed to find a home, set down roots, and regroup. We needed help.
We came to Seattle weary and worn, battered and bruised. In desparate need of family to surround us while everything was falling apart around us. So:
- Our family of five moved into my parents ONE BEDROOM basement apartment!
- We lived out of our suitcases for the next 6 months while our stuff was packed away in Denver.
- David closed our business, went back to Microsoft and got health insurance.
- We went to doctor after doctor to try and find help for our son.
- We put the boys in public school for the very first time.
As time passed things began to settle down. We slowly transitioned from being on life support to breathing on our own once again. Getting our footing little by little and coming out of what was the most difficult season of our lives yet. I feel like I have aged about ten years in one! The lines of my face show it and the tenderness of my heart bears witness.
I am grateful. Grateful that our lives have purpose. That each chapter of our story always ends with the beautiful pen stokes of an author who reminds us that he knows the end from the beginning. That precious things are formed in darkness and that the movements of our heart towards trust, love and openness – when everything in us wants to shut down – count.
It’s hard to be vulnerable. To tell others that you are weak and need them to come along side of you.
I’m thankful for:
- Our family and friends who rose to the occasion and embraced us at our messiest.
- Doctors that were insightful and dedicated to helping us.
- Fresh air.
- Breakthrough for our son!!! I’ll have to write about Neurofeedback and how it has transformed our family!
- A home next to the cascade mountains. The picture above was taken from our guest room and every time I look out our windows I am reminded that God’s ways are better than mine. Every time.
- David – who has my heart.
We always said we didn’t want to permanently move back to Seattle because of the grey skies, rain and traffic. I don’t know that we would have moved back had the pressure not been as intense. Now, I can’t imagine anyplace I’d rather be. We have fallen in love with the Pacific Northwest in a way that we never imagined possible. This time we are armed with copious amounts of vitamin d, rain boots, and the carpool lane!
Isn’t it funny how sometimes the BEST thing for us is the very thing we would never do for ourselves?! If you are in a difficult season, I hope this reminds you that there is hope and that your darkness is forming something rare and beautiful in your life.